Your Whispering Homunculus: Fifty More Passersby, Part One

“I’m back Master. Task completed.” “You have the fifty I asked for?” “Yes, oh Corpulently Nasaled One, with a note for each and every unusual one of them I met. May I ask why you assigned me this task, master? “No. Now hand the list over, and go and oil the imp.” Those of you with long memories may recall that in the (ahem) well-regarded publication Your Whispering Homunculus we had a table of 50 passing folk. These characters might be...

Your Whispering Homunculus: Curious Locales—The Lean Tree House Gambling Inn and Mistress Smedge’s Seamstery, Part Two

“Anyway slug, stop staring at that picture and empty my chamber pot.” Curious Locales presents quirky locations for GMs to drop into their campaigns. Free of class and level, they can be used in any fantasy RPG system. Mistress Smedge has a dark secret. She has royal blood in her veins and is the bastard sister of the present queen, in fact—and unwanted by the crown. Her true name is Princess Angelina Gatiola Cremp. Or if you wish, she could be...

Your Whispering Homunculus: Curious Locales—The Lean Tree House Gambling Inn and Mistress Smedge’s Seamstery, Part One

“Thank you for showing me your private gallery, master. Goodness, that’s an odd picture there.” “Yes, well, Mummy was a three-headed obscenity with alien flutes emerging from her spine at the time, but she got better.” “No, Master, not the family gallery. That one next to them—the one with the odd willow and river-barge merging into one strange location. It seems almost… normal…” Curious locales are quirky locations for GMs to drop...

Your Whispering Homunculus: Curious Locales—The Babcock Place, Part Two

“And iron my armoured underthings. I am heading out into the wilds tonight!” “Yes master.” Curious locales are quirky locations for GMs to drop into their campaigns. Free of class and level, they can be used in any fantasy RPG system. The Babcock Place The kin don’t get along, of course, and there are always stories of some sort of special festival day where one is chosen to be hunted by the others and literally torn apart. Those who live not...

Your Whispering Homunculus: Curious Locales—The Babcock Place, Part One

“Master, who’s in the portrait?” “Oh her? That’s my distant kin Wholesome Babcock. She’s not pretty is she? I’ve not been to see them for quite some time now, years in fact, but they—keep in touch with me.” “You’ve never mentioned them before, your strangeness.” “And for two good reasons. The first of which is that they have a very, very bad reputation.” “And the second?” “The second, slug, is that nothing I do is ever of any concern of yours...

Your Whispering Homunculus: Evocative Words, Part Two

Evocative Words—Part Two “Hmm—Grimshall—that’s a word I haven’t heard used before. I shall use it today at the wicked-persons glovepuppet class. That’ll stump them.” Continuing last episode’s look at words, there are also names that can evoke a particular mood that have no meaning as well as those that use true words: a glance at a map from my own homeland of Derbyshire in England tantalizes with place names such as Breamfield, Dark Lane,...

Your Whispering Homunculus: Evocative Words, Part One

Evocative Words—Part One “Reading, master?” “Silence maggot, or I’ll have you flensed. I’m too busy consuming Mugwort’s Tome of Evocative Words to communicate with you in any way. Now go and put some more lard on the cat’s boil. Her yowling is irritating me.” Words, beautiful, lovely words. Each paints a glorious picture, and though the old saying of a thousand words is true, so also is the reverse—simple words can evoke images and implant...

Your Whispering Homunculus: Unusual Attire, Part Two

Unusual Attire—Part Two “You’ve changed your mind, master… it is master isn’t it?” “Of course it is. Now tighten my corset, tie up this blouse, and help me put my tiara on or I’ll be late.” Continuing our look at unusual attire, we come to the ladies… Female Attire She’s dressed as some sort of pantomime giant slug She wears a gown of cunning and beautiful silks, held together with a hangman’s noose It appears she’s wearing a gown...

Your Whispering Homunculus: Unusual Attire, Part One

Unusual Attire “Interesting attire you’ve chosen for this evening’s ball, master.” “I see nothing unusual about it. Noteworthy definitely; unusual no.” Well, my thinking is—if he’s going dressed as an evil apocalyptic duck, I wonder what the other guests will come as? Nothing is more important than making a first impression, they say. Well tonight’s YWH certainly aims for that. Dress your NPCs up in some of these costumes, and the questions are...

Your Whispering Homunculus: Curious Locales—Slaughterhouse and Undertaking Emporium, Part Two

Filletess Crab’s Slaughterhouse and Undertaking Emporium, Part Two Curious locales are quirky locations for GMs to drop into their campaigns. Free of class and level, they can be used in any fantasy RPG system. They consist of a single locale with a colorful description, characters and relationships, and ideas for adventures and using them in your campaign. Cut and paste them into your adventures and flesh out the detail, or detail out...

Your Whispering Homunculus: Curious Locales—Slaughterhouse and Undertaking Emporium, Part One

Curious Locales—Filletess Honeysuckle Crab’s Slaughterhouse and Undertaking Emporium “Master!” “What is it now, slug?” “Look, I’ve found a property for sale in the Citystate Gazetteer. It sounds ideal for a summer retreat: quirky, cheap but in need of a major fumigation, let me read it to you…” Curious locales are quirky locations for GMs to drop into their campaigns. Free of class and level, they can be used in any fantasy RPG. They consist of...

Your Whispering Homunculus: d12 Table Time, Part Two

d12 Table Time, Part Two “Pass the port and owlbear cheese, insect. I’m feeling peckish.” Continuing our dubiously useful collection of d12 tables, we start with a quick set of strange coincidences…  A Dozen Serving Wenches or Lads whose Names Rhyme with Chicken It’s occasionally fun to let your players read things into coincidences that just simply aren’t there. Having every barmaid or serving lad have a name that sounds similar is just one...

Your Whispering Homunculus: d12 Table Time, Part One

d12 Table Time “Master, you’ve been in there an awful long time, are you alright?” “Of course I am, and stop interrupting me. I’m just studying volume XXXII of Barn’s Almanac of Dubiously Useful Random Tables, using only the twelve-sided dice. Now, if you haven’t got anything better to do, go away and rebuild that broken harpsichord.” For no good reason whatsoever, here is a collection of extremely obscure and random d12 charts. So obtuse are...

Your Whispering Homunculus: 50 Treasures of the Southlands, Part Two

As a sister to our previous articles Treasures of the Pharaohs and Treasures of the Rajahs, we humbly present for your delectation this article, which itemizes a few trinkets of unusual treasure from the fabled Southlands Campaign Setting. You can use these treasures to spice up troves of well-traveled wizard, bard, or other collectors. No prices have been set for the items, so you to drop them at any stage into your adventures: 25.    A...

Your Whispering Homunculus: 50 Treasures of the Southlands, Part One

“Well?” “Well, what, your domeness?” “You’re covered in dust—explain.” “Ah, the dust. Yes, well, I was under the Great Stair and—” “You are not to go under-stairs, ever. You’ve only been briefly in my employ and would do well to remember the last homunculus that pried too deeply into my affairs and property.” “Yes, master. I was drawn by the curious red leather tome with its ankh...


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