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Collection of Curiosities: Inside the Bird

Collection of Curiosities: Inside the Bird

Dire TurkeyIt might seem a tad ludicrous to have anything other than stuffing inside your chosen feast bird, but you never really know what will happen at that next gathering the adventurers attend. Happy feasting (and Happy Thanksgiving to all those celebrating it)!

You can roll randomly for a result below, or use the handy number provided with each entry to figure out your result on a d12. You can also pick the one that works for the area in which your characters currently linger.

d12. Curiosity

  1. The stuffing hides the lost jewels of the host’s spouse.
  2. Someone must have a sense of humor: the stuffing is cotton and the unstuffed doll is inside the bird, too. With pins stuck in it. Is someone hoping that a giant bird will eat the person the doll is supposed to represent?
  3. Candy stuffing. Someone mixed up the holidays.
  4. It’s not so much the stuffing that is amazing as it is the fact that no matter how much you eat, there seems to be more in the bird.
  5. Each time someone tries to remove something from the bird, it makes a horrible sound.
  6. The moment someone tries to remove the stuffing, the utensil that is used to remove it (or appendage) discovers that the bird has teeth there. The “bird” seems to wish to eat that person.
  7. The bird simply explodes the moment something touches the stuffing within it.
  8. When the first stuffing is removed, the bird starts uncooking. Then unplucking. It seems to be moving backward in time.
  9. “Eat me not,” the bird says in Common upon stuffing removal.
  10. Inside the bird is another cooked bird. Inside that is another cooked bird. How many birds are in this bird?
  11. Parchment scraps are in the bird. Each scrap has a word. What is someone trying to tell you?
  12. The entire bird seems to be an illusion. Boo.

1 thought on “Collection of Curiosities: Inside the Bird”

  1. Nice list. Numbers 5 and 6 seem inspired by the Three Stooges (“Why didn’t ya kill this bird before I cooked it?”).

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