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Your Whispering Homunculus—50 Strange Lucky Charms

Your Whispering Homunculus—50 Strange Lucky Charms

Your Whispering HomunculusMaster Pett’s Your Whispering Homunculus presents only the finest in British gaming. Indeed, you are not likely to find a more comprehensive assortment of miscellany anywhere. (So much more than just another bloke in a dress.)

“Quickly, toadlet, I am in desperate need of help!”

“Why? What ails my considerable lord?”

“I’ve misplaced my lucky cow’s udder, given to me by a passing monk of the Order of the Turquoise Churn. I’ve had it with me since Rune School. Find it. Find it now or my whole career may be in jeopardy!”

How strange the power of inanimate objects is when they have abilities appointed them.

Luck is a strange bedfellow—some have it in spades, some get none throughout their whole lives. People will do anything to improve their luck, from four-leaf clovers to rabbit’s feet to horseshoes hanging above their thresholds. What might happen, however, when the range of gods, beliefs, and superstitions explode as they would in a fantasy setting?

Well, one possible option is the frankly ridiculous set of lucky charms below. In a world where luck has countless faces for thousands of gods, then that definition of providence may be very broad indeed.

The question might be asked of the GM as to just why these objects are lucky, and what the story behind them is. Is there a burial site of obscure saints currently occupied by a monstrous fire breathing three-headed hill giant who tosses out holy relics like hurled rocks, is there a consummate charlatan at work who is presently endearing herself to the local royal family by proffering fortune tokens, or is it just peasants up to their usual pointless stupidity in assigning any object with good fortune?

And if the mind is willing…

  1. A pair of lucky toad lips mounted on a piece of string
  2. A lucky leather sole from the left boot of a convicted bugbear warlock
  3. A fortune knot made of hag hair
  4. A lucky stain said to be the blood of a saint
  5. A lucky trio of stirge proboscis firmly stuck into the wooden scalp of a disappointingly obvious ginger wig
  6. A dead fortune cuckoo
  7. A piece of lucky hard cheese carved to resemble Leffnia, Demigoddess of Minor Good Fortune, Dice, and Honey Badgers
  8. The pelvis of Saint Oswald of Threbb
  9. A providential hydra-skin corset, set with pictures of crossed humanoid fingers
  10. A lucky desiccated turbot, lovingly mounted on a leather thong
  11. A lucky rust monster propeller held in green glass
  12. A fluky breastplate—much battered, but always intact
  13. A miniature depicting Lucky Lady Greevile Strange eating an aubergine
  14. Intertwined sticks of lucky seaweed and pasta threaded through a shire horse horseshoe
  15. A bag of lucky whelks
  16. An extremely fortunate chicken, whose mounted and preserved head proclaims in tiny writing upon its leather and walnut shamrock-shaped mount that it was swallowed by two crocodiles and struck by lightning on the same day and still lived. It is therefore, it asserts, the luckiest chicken in history in the known lands and is signed by a bishop to prove it, who adds that it was delicious
  17. Blessed Sister Jessica’s Wimple
  18. A lucky matching xorn–pelt glove and scarf set replete with miniature iron number 7s
  19. A lucky wicker piglet with a human face
  20. A giant cricket’s long jumping leg with the words “fortune to she who bears me” written on the side in henna
  21. A large chest filled with keys of all sizes
  22. A sawdust-stuffed frog held in its own purse made of hamster skin with three keys tied to it
  23. A lucky badger’s ear set on a fancy silver necklace with the words “All my love and blessed good fortune my darling Letticia, from SJB
  24. The distal phalange of Saint Cumbrey of Grost, in a leather bag
  25. A lucky goat udder, sealed in a blessed receptacle
  26. An auspicious wrap of owlbear fur and feathers set with lucky heather and a hare’s head
  27. A horseshoe-shaped carrot
  28. A pickled, seven headed piglet
  29. A fortune tortoise, its back painted with lucky runes
  30. A piece of red coral that greatly resembles the face of Saint Bethus-o-Twime, the so-called Fluky Saint
  31. The sacred skull of Saint Cresp—the world’s only sainted catoblepas
  32. Two lucky hamster-sized top-hats labeled luck and timely
  33. A soapstone carving of Our Lady of Miniature Topiary and Blessings Involving Poultry
  34. A providential left glove of arrow snaring
  35. A 10-ft.-high mound of used horseshoes
  36. An albatross, mounted on a large plinth, and with the words “fortune favors the foolhardy” in Draconic written on a brass plate
  37. An owlbear wishbone
  38. A double-headed wedding veil
  39. A gold and ruby ladybug
  40. A magnificent painting depicting a vast rainbow devouring naughty black puddings and oozes
  41. A giant ladybug somehow imprisoned within a circular glass jar just big enough to hold it
  42. A lovingly painted miniature on a pebble of Our Lady of Divine Blessed Fortune astride her fortune piglet Scalg
  43. A giant-sized wedding veil
  44. A mimic in the shape of a wishing well
  45. A dead, footless rabbit
  46. Seven magpie heads mounted on a cold iron necklace
  47. A silver amulet depicting a shooting star and a rampaging herd of dire cattle
  48. The ashes of Awrbin Brimmley, the oh-so-lucky Chimney Sweep of Ashby, in a large iron box
  49. A charm bracelet with silver horseshoe, copper cricket, and electrum sloth
  50. A completely flat, dead black cat

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