(Illustration by Chris McFann)
Master Pett’s Your Whispering Homunculus presents only the finest in British gaming. Indeed, you are not likely to find a more comprehensive assortment of miscellany anywhere.
(So much more than just another bloke in a dress.)
__
“Stew!”
“Lord?”
“Dumplings!”
“Master?”
“Tripe!”
“Your worship?”
“All delicious meals in their own right, slugthing, but I have need of more exotic meals tonight. I need those meals that truly stay in the minds (and possibly stomachs) of the true connoisseur.”
“I have the very thing here master. Hundro Ockpot’s Guide to Obscure, Unusual, and Occasionally Revolting Meals, Volume I…”
***
Meals (Cost/Day)
Good (5 sp)
Common (3 sp)
Poor (2 sp)
The Pathfinder Core Rulebook gives an excellent potted description of meals, but categorizing all food in one of three ways misses out on a potentially interesting piece of interaction and color that gives an added dimension to your gaming table.
Regional meals vary enormously, and food within a fantasy campaign offers you a great chance to indulge in some imaginative delights: a meat pie in one town could be a significantly different meat pie in another. People tend to live off whatever happens to be abundant locally, but they soon grow tired of the same old dishes and try to spice them up a little.
Here are some foods to throw at your players to keep them on their toes, pique their interest, or just make them feel queasy as they tramp the byways and valleys of your villages, outposts, and camps. In each case, as they are local delicacies, you should consider them common local meals, or where more exotic ingredients are found, up the price to 5 sp. In general, meals with stranger parts—such as roast stirge—is the result of a happy chance encounter although if you really wish to have that stirge farm outside town feel free to develop it and its insane owner.
As usual, use these variations sparingly. A town full of truly weird food could be an unusual diversion.
- Roast hedgehog with spinach
- Pot Luck Pie
- Whole roast stirge with cauliflowers
- Pig’s blood with scrambled eggs
- Stewed dormice with greengage jam
- Beef tongue with pumpkin
- Calf’s feet jelly
- Deep fried monkey toes
- Fermented herring
- Cow’s heart with fresh vegetables
- Jellied eels
- Bison liver with boiled potatoes and parsley
- Grouse pie and cucumber soup
- Boiled shocker lizard and cabbage
- Owl soup with black bread
- Roast magpie with courgettes and pickled gerkins
- Fried snails and asparagus
- Giblet soup
- Veal cake with marrows
- Hashed dire game and cabbage
- Lark pie and jumbles
- Pickled tongue with apples and hard cheese
- Roasted whole songbirds with dried fruit
- Sea slugs with red pepper sauce
- Steamed dire boar tripe with onions
- Deep fried blind toad with turnips
- Strips of dried darkmantle flesh with apple chutney
- Rook pie and sprouts
- Boiled giant frog with broad beans
- Stirge livers and mushrooms
- Larks in onions
- Potted lobster
- Goat’s head with stewed celery
- Fermented giant crab meat
- Ram casserole with horseradish sauce
- Fried ugly fish with baked mushrooms
- Curried cockatrice
- Turnip soup with cottage loaf
- Deep fried dire bat and hardbread
- Stewed kidneys with sprouts
- Broiled ox-tails with orange brandy
- Rabbits stewed in milk
- Pickled hams and eggs
- Barley gruel
- Roast sturgeon with turnips
- Tapioca soup and fried whitebait
- Toad-in-the-hole
- Potted turbot
- Boiled sea kale
- Garlic fried sparrows with roast potatoes and chives
(This post is Product Identity.)
Yum!
I once knew a fellow that ate an owl. He said he’d rather be shot in the face than eat it again.
This post reminds me of old school dinners with their ‘esoteric’ ingredients. Hilarious!
As always, an awesome touch of color.
You’ve been watching Bizarre Foods again haven’t you Rich? Great article!
I am only thankful I at lunch before reading. Glorious list for next game!
“another bloke in a dress” ????
Was that an Eddie Izzard reference? If so … well done!
Lovely stuff.
I now have more pages of whispering homonculus bookmarked than anything else, a faultless resource.
Thank you kindly everyone, I’m glad the homunculus continues to be useful.
James, without giving too much away, hopefully when you read a foody reference in the Jade Regent AP I’ve just drafted it’ll raise a smile and you’ll see why this one came out at the same time.
Ha, Eddie Izzard, cool – that would be the marvellous Mr Gable’s touch however, he seems to think I ought to be wearing tiaras.
There was a brilliant list in an early Dragon that had lots of unusual foods, so this is a little homage to that – huzzah!
Owl pie – yum.
Thanks again everyone, have fun.
Rich
All ethnic food was created on a dare.
I’ve made Toad-in-the-hole numerous times. It’s pretty easy, and quite tasty if you use the spicier sausages.