Everything must go! Prices slashed 100%! Please just take these items. I don’t want them anymore. Free me!

Bancho’s Fleet Catamaran

Wondrous item, very rare (requires attunement)

This item functions as a folding boat. When activated in any form, it is festooned with flamboyant red and blue racing stripes and pendants along its hull, and its speed is 10 times normal for a boat of its type.

Curse. This item is cursed. Attuning to it curses you until you are targeted by the remove curse spell or similar magic.

Bancho was the shipwright of the century before being imprisoned for owning seditious literature, and this teak box with mother-of-pearl handles was his greatest accomplishment. This item’s boat forms are notoriously difficult to control, being made for the premier sailors of the kingdom. All checks made to pilot it suffer a −10 penalty, making it a nightmare in anything other than the calm waters where it first set sail.

Bricks of Compulsive Construction

Wondrous item, legendary (requires attunement)

This worn canvas bag contains bricks, and on both bag and each brick is emblazoned the same red sun symbol. The bag is activated when the attuned creature has a clear vision of the structure they want to build. They then begin to work tirelessly at double speed, requiring no food, drink or sleep for the duration and gaining immunity to all environmental conditions such as heat or cold. The bag produces exactly as many bricks as are need until the structure is finished. If forcibly removed from their work, the bricklayer will attempt to return for the next 1d4 + 1 days.

Curse. This item is cursed. Attuning to it curses you until you are targeted by the remove curse spell or similar magic.

On the completion of the structure, you dust off your hands and fall into a coma for an amount of time equal to how long you spent building. Based on history, it’d be good to have someone there to catch you.

Halberd of Ill Temperament

Weapon (halberd), rare (requires attunement)

You gain advantage on attacks against lawfully aligned creatures and gain a +1 to attack and damage rolls made with this magic weapon. When you roll a 20 on an attack roll made with this weapon, the halberd’s shaft extends, and its reach changes to 15 ft. for 1 minute.

Curse. This item is cursed. Attuning to it curses you until you are targeted by the remove curse spell or similar magic.

A thoroughly dirty polearm, this halberd is both a source of attraction and repulsion for smiths across the multiverse. It is constantly struck by tantrums and fancies. It would be inaccurate to call it an intelligent weapon as its whims are simpler, like those of a dog or a baby. When pleased, the halberd’s shaft extends (as detailed above). When upset (or when you roll a 1 on an attack roll made with it), its reach shrinks to 5 ft. for 1 minute. (At the GM’s discretion, the halberd might become pleased or upset at other times as well.)

Jasmine of Pleasant Odors

Wondrous item, rare (requires attunement)

This potted plant purifies all gas and odor-based hazards within a 30-ft. radius. In addition, after taking a long rest within 30 ft. of the item, you gain advantage on saving throws against one disease or poison currently affecting you.

Curse. This item is cursed. Attuning to it curses you until you are targeted by the remove curse spell or similar magic.

Settled in a decorated porcelain pot, this well-manicured jasmine plant exudes one of the most delicious scents known to mortals. But that same aroma brings unwanted company as all living creatures in a 1-mile radius have advantage on checks to locate the jasmine. The chances of random encounters while toting this item are doubled (especially true for owlbears).

Pathetic Pocket Twin

Wondrous item, very rare (requires attunement)

This item functions as a figurine of wondrous power. This inch-long ceramic approximation of a human figure slowly takes on the detailed attributes of the one attuned to it. When the command word is spoken, the figurine becomes a copy of its user per the simulacrum spell.

Curse. This item is cursed. Attuning to it curses you until you are targeted by the remove curse spell or similar magic.

This simulacrum is particularly frustrating in several regards. It has disadvantage on all d20 rolls. Also, it has the polar opposite personality traits as you, and on a successful DC 15 Wisdom saving throw, the simulacrum can ignore your latest spoken command and do something else. Lastly, it will always claim to be the “real” you to others. After you first activate it, should the simulacrum be destroyed, it automatically reforms from the figurine after 7 days. These items are commonly found at the bottom of wells, in vast trash piles, or inside active volcanoes.

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