Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 9)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part eight, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY THIRTY-FIVE Pretty darn good day today. Apparently, my new frost-elf baby has warmed the spectral heart of my horrible, racist, strategically...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 8)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part seven, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY THIRTY-FOUR Odd day, today. Our landlord stopped by this morning, and apparently Jimbo’s lease is technically commercial/industrial, rather than residential; this...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 7)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part six, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY TWENTY-NINE Mondays. Seriously. Had surprise, very brief, one-sidedly drunken performance review with Dark Lord Torkelheim today; he says that —since I’ve been here a...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 6)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part five, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY TWENTY-EIGHT Who am I kidding? Of course I read Shaendralya’s note to Sigvald. I’m evil. Here it is, in its entirety. NOTE: it appears that she may speak some strange...

Monster Monday: Thppgrg, Long-Suffering Goblin Minion of Dark Lord Torkelheim

You’ve seen him showing up in Friday’s Funny. Now you can roll with him in your game! It’s Thppgrg, the long-suffering goblin minion of Dark Lord Torkelheim. Take a look at Boomer’s statistics for Thppgrg, whose first diary entry takes you into the world of the strategically important fountain and theoretically important fountain room. Thppgrg, Long-Suffering Goblin Minion of Dark Lord Torkelheim CR 1 & 5/6 (AKA...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 5)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) Before you get started on this entry, which is, as it says, part five, take heed! New readers, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part four, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY TWENTY-ONE No longer sleeping in Sigvald’s room. Extremely worried about being stabbed to death in the middle of...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 4)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) Hey, reader! Yeah, you. There are more parts to this. You’ll want to read those first! See that tag at the bottom that says Thppgrg? Click on it if you’re new to this diary. Otherwise, you can go here for Part 3 and do this the hard way (by backtracking). And if you’ve been keeping up: Good on you! (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY FIFTEEN Monday. Blech. DAY SIXTEEN A day of...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 3)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) Previously… (Hey, there are two parts to read first. Get to it!) DAY ELEVEN Crap. Casting spells not all that difficult; CONTROLLING said magical spells upon casting exponentially more impossible than ever imagined. Formal schooling in the arcane arts perhaps more important than previously expected. After a shockingly small amount of preparation and much subsequent experimentation, have...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 2)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) Previously… (Seriously. Check out the previously if you missed it!) DAY FIVE New unintelligent undead arrived today. More accurately, the bodies of the attacking dwarven warriors have been re-animated to act as guards, and so has Sigvald. New arrivals are total jerks; at Jimbo’s suggestion, am trying to figure out how to sneak up on them and put silly hats on their heads...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 1)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) Dear Diary, Just got a new gig as a low-level dungeon guard for Dark Lord Torkelheim, which is all but guaranteed to end in tragedy. This will be my account of how I get killed by adventurers, by the spells of adventurers and/or my own boss, by other dungeon dwellers, by the pet of an adventurer or of another dungeon-dweller, by a malfunctioning trap of some kind, by a curse, or...


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