Articles By Author - Clinton J. Boomer

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 24)

As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please read the earlier installments first. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY FIFTY-FIVE (later) Well. Planning—and subsequently executing—a company picnic is significantly harder than I initially expected. Here’s my whole freaking Saturday basically wasted, and I’m no closer to having that punch made than I was this morning; just getting the boxes of streamers, tablecloths, and party hats out of their crates...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 23)

As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please read the earlier installments first. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY FIFTY-FOUR (date in t-minus 7 minutes) I owe my friends. BIG TIME. Quite literally, actually. I very specifically had to sign actual paperwork documenting that I, in fact, owe my friends and that, very specifically, what I owe them is quote-unquote BIG TIME. So now I’ve got clean pants, and money, and reservations to what is...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 22)

As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please read the earlier installments first. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY FIFTY-FOUR (I think. Later than this morning, most likely in the . . . I’m going to go with mid-afternoon, now, probably? Also, I’m pretty sure the dates on this diary have gotten a little mixed up.) Fridays. Yuck. Locked—as is so often the case—in the bathroom. Just woke up in the middle of a large—and seemingly quite...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 21)

As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please read the earlier installments first. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY FIFTY, late night, [panic mode activated] Aaaaaagh! Date on Friday AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! DAY FIFTY (very early) With . . . with . . . Abliguritia Thundersmasher-Roth! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! DAY FIFTY-ONE AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH! It is Tuesday now. Lots of stuff going on around here. I do not care about any of it. Or, I suppose—more...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 20)

As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please read the earlier installments first. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY (technically night) FORTY-EIGHT . . . later on than my other two entries today, obviously, and very, VERY possibly already quite a bit into the dark beginnings of DAY FORTY-NINE. I still don’t have a watch. And I swear, this had better be my last entry today, or I am going to be very put out. Things have gone from bad to worse to...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 19)

As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part eighteen, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY (technically night) FORTY-EIGHT . . . later on than my other entry today, obviously, or possibly into the very beginnings of DAY FORTY-NINE. I don’t have a watch. Okay, so now I’m at this stupid night club. It is very...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 18)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part seventeen, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY FORTY-EIGHT So, the show is going . . . oddly. The second and third nights of rehearsals were, if anything, a step up in the general-insanity department, and I...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 17)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part sixteen, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY FORTY-SIX Wow. Interesting rehearsal last night. First official read-through of the completed script, first night of blocking and costume-fitting, first formal...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 16)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part fifteen, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY FORTY-FIVE And with that, finally, it’s done. The stupid play . . . is complete. We got the bugger. It took hours, and hours, and HOURS, and tears, and sweat, and...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 15)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part fourteen, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY FORTY-THREE Best Monday EVER. I mean, it was still pretty horrible, and full of stress and annoyances and existential malaise and one brief stabbing (not of me,...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 14)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part thirteen, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY FORTY-ONE Can’t write. Hung over. Also, extremely poor yet again—Mr. Bliss is just frighteningly good at poker. Supernaturally so, perhaps; I have certain...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 13)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part twelve, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY FORTY Several interesting developments today. First and foremost: holy crap, I just got paid. It turns out that payday for the Exceptionally Evil Corporation is on...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 12)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part eleven, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY THIRTY-EIGHT Guh. More toilet paper strung up in the haunted forest; additionally, significantly more flaming poo bags on the front steps of the dungeon today....

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 11)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part ten, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY THIRTY-SEVEN Tuesdays. Worst day since Mondays. So it seems that the previously mentioned theoretical prank-war has been officially confirmed. There was a chance,...

Oh, I’m Going to Get Killed Any Minute Now (Part 10)

(Also Titled: The Ongoing Diary of Thppgrg, Goblin Minion) As ever, readers who are new to the diary, please scroll down a bit to where you see the Thppgrg tag. Click on it. Yeah, that’s right. Otherwise, if you missed part nine, you can just click here. (Art by Chris McFann.) DAY THIRTY-SIX Monday. Oh, wow. Just . . . Where to even start? First and foremost, the new Assistant Manager is awful. AWFUL. Awfully awfulishly awfillingly SUPER-awful....

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